Six Months of UniTEA

Today is our six month anniversary! It's such a weird feeling because it feels like our wedding was yesterday and 20 years ago all at once. I guess time flies when you're having fun? Anyway, I have SO much more to talk about and share here, but I wanted to make it a point today to share with you our ceremony. It was perfect. A little chilly, some would argue, but otherwise absolutely perfect.

Look at all those coats!! It was freezing!

I'll never forget the day we sat down with our officiant. I was so excited! Just the fact that he might be able to meant so much! It was only about an hour before our meeting when Adam said "so, what's the plan?"

"...plan? We need a plan?"

"Yeah, do we want to do a unity ceremony? How long will our ceremony be? Do we want readings?" Adam continued Oh man. I hadn't thought about any of this. Like, at all.

A quick Google search returned with the definition of a unity ceremony and some examples. It's different in each culture, but traditionally, in Western culture, there are three that are the most popular- lighting the candle, the mixing of sand, and the pouring of water. None of those really spoke to me. I hate sand, water gets poured down the drain afterward, and I don't think Preservation Hall, this historical landmark built in the 1800s, would be super cool with us bringing a flame into the building.

I realized that we didn't have to follow any of these. We could come up with something just as symbolic, but especially meaningful to us and our Alice in Wonderland inspired wedd-I GOT IT! TEA!!

I turned to Adam "LET'S MAKE TEA! We could have a uni-TEA"

I was met with a blank look of supportive confusion.

"Right now?"

"no no, for the ceremony! Our Unity!"

"...I guess it's a launching point. Something we can bring up to Wil as a placeholder until we think of something better."

"What? You don't love it? I thought it was pretty good."

"eeeeh."

"well, at least we have a launching point!"

It was important to me that this unity ceremony be meaningful and special to BOTH of us. I loved this idea, but I couldn't exactly explain why I loved it, besides it giving me an excuse to buy teacups (hehehe).

We meet Wil at a coffee shop where we sit down to discuss wedding stuff. No to readings, not long, yes to unity ceremony, etc. And then he asked THE question, "What do you want to do for your unity ceremony"

I take a deep breath, knowing Adam was only partially on board. And even that part of him that was wasn't sure it liked the plan at all. Maybe it wasn't as good of an idea as I thought it was...

"...Ok....So, I think this might sounds crazy....but stay with me here.....what if we.....made tea?"

He paused for a moment, thinking. I was all but certain he thought this was the dumbest thing he'd ever heard until, after what felt live an eternity, he responded.

"That's AMAZING! Oh my god!" He went on to explain how the symbolism is perfect! If you take it off too soon, the tea isn't strong enough, but if you let it sit too long it'll burn. The conditions have to be absolutely perfect to have good tea!

"yeah!" I chimed in. There were fireworks going off in my head! He was perfectly articulating all of the sentiments I just couldn't connect into words. "Maybe I can bring the tea! Something that's so descriptive of Adam! Maybe it's black tea, for his strength, and cocoa for his sweetness! Maybe it's floral for how handsome he is! Yes! After all, tea it made out of flowers, which are beautiful and produce and fruit; leaves, which give us oxygen; and herbs, which have healing properties!!"

"...And I'll bring water." Adam said very dryly.

"Oh, but that's so perfect!" Wil said beaming. It was as if his words were now connected straight to my heart as he embellished that both of these things, on their own are so important to life. Individually, they serve a purpose, they have value. But you bring them together to create something new, just as strong, and just as valuable that cannot be undone. He got it. And more then that, he could express it in the most beautiful, articulate ways. Better then I could, and I'm the one who came up with it.

This was it. It HAD to happen this way. The look on Adam's face confirmed that was what we were to do. It was so perfectly symbolic of everything out relationship meant to us. Every word! Wil just absolutely, not question, no hesitation GOT IT!

We would let the tea brew while we exchanged vows. And then we would pour it for each other. We felt that pouring it for each other, was symbolic of both of us bringing our ingredient (ourself) to this tea (marriage) and giving it to the other, while still maintaining a piece for ourselves. A marriage is two pieces- a piece of you and a piece of them. One thing made out of two. And suddenly there it was, the tea and the water were tea. He and I were an us. Two things made into one.

Once the tea was brewed and poured, and the vows were said, we would share our first sip as man and wife. A sip of a tea brewed from what was essentially, us.

Not shown: Us clinking the teacups as if to toast. That tea was still SO HOT. But note- our pinkies were out. lol

Once again, the hunt for teacups began. I wanted something demitasse, so we could drink it as man and wife, in front of everyone. I wanted something that matched, but was different. I wanted something entirely simple, as to let the ceremony speak for itself.

After months of searching every thrift store in the area, and a daily Etsy sweep, I settled on these:

They were perfectly whimsical! I know absolutely nothing about the teapot, which I found at a thrift store in Van Nuys, but the teacups themselves have a very special story. More on that in another post!

We even used the teacups as cake toppers at the reception! Having the ceremony and reception take place at two different locations, I wanted there to be a thread that tied the two together. This worked perfectly.

I absolutely plan to do a blog post about the cake. I loved everything about the wedding cake process.

Our flower girl was called that because she was to bring the tea down the isle, which technically was made of flowers. We didn't have any real flowers anywhere in our wedding. These little drawers we found were the perfect size to hold our rings and the tea. We even velcro-d the tiny drawers shut so that when the 3 year old carried them down the isle, it wouldn't open on her. The outer little drawers were fitted with foam to make sure the rings didn't slide around. It was just too perfect! It reminded Adam and I of when Alice was in the White Rabbit's house looking for his gloves after she eats the cookie. (Our flower girl got very sick, so she was unable to carry the drawers down the isle. This is why you can find the little desk in the table behind Wil on the photo above.)

The center drawer was where the tea was held

I had a tea custom made for our ceremony. It was an extra special tea. It had his birth flower (the snow drop), my birth flower (the rose), black tea (strength), and cocoa nibs, dark chocolate, and strawberry (for sweetness).

It smelled wonderful, and it tasted even better, we gave it to our guests at the reception to say "thank you."

The back of the tag says "The UniTEA of Adam and Bri" steep 3-5 minutes

And that's the story of how this uniTEA was part of my wedding and how we symbolically consumed our love. Wait- that sounds so much weirder than it is. Eh, oh well. Happy 6 months to my handsome husband! (Still feels odd to say)

Huge thanks to Wil for well...everything! and to Themedshots for these amazing photos! Looking at them and reliving this memory fill me with love.